Dealing With A Chronic Complainer

QUESTION:

I’ve been in this position for only a few months, but it seems that one particular partner

has been in my office every week complaining about something. It’s either about how I

should be exercising more management authority over some other partner or the way

certain things are being done. Thankfully, this character is a productive contributor and

does not appear to be sharing his gripes with everyone else. I’m quite comfortable dealing

with any partner who’s not pulling their weight, but this constant whining is definitely

getting to me. What do you do with partners like this?

RESPONSE:

First, you described the whining partner as "a productive contributor." Often even the most

productive contributors are needy . . . they need to be told how productive and important

they are. This neediness manifests itself in many ways, but the periodic visits and advice

may just be an effort to fish for positive reinforcement. (Somebody needs to tell them

thank you.) It's sometimes easy to think that spending time with the needy is a waste of

time and a diversion from really important substantive tasks. In fact, making "a productive

contributor" feel appreciated and good about him or herself is pretty high up on the really

important parts of your managing partner role.

Secondly, listening, even to whining, instructions, and complaints, comes with the territory.

Since you are a new managing partner, there is probably a certain amount of testing

occurring. It will probably bleed off over time. Also, your frequent visitor may be of the

view that you do not yet have a solid grasp on the controls. He or she will eventually get

tired of giving instructions. However, be warned that not listening is just going to alienate

him. Letting him play it out by listening and responding, in the long run, will probably help

build the support base that you need to have to do a good job.

Some veteran managing partners have discovered the wisdom of making an effort to stick

their heads in to say hello to these type of partners, while on their "rounds." They have

found that the effort to be proactive dramatically reduces the complainer’s visits. It is also

easier to exit when you are the one stopping by.

Further, while constant complainers can suck up a lot of energy, is there some legitimacy to

any of their comments? You may want to look at how you are now feeling about this

partner. If your attitude toward his complaining is negative, you may want to just suspend

that negativity for a while. Focus on perceiving him as potentially having valuable input and

capable of providing a positive remedial approach to some of these complaints. Even the

whiners have good ideas. Don’t dismiss the sermonettes in their entirety or necessarily

discourage them. They are information – either ideas you can use or information about the

sermonizer that may be valuable down the line.

You’re likely not to know what this partner’s next complaint will be, but you can formulate

some optional approaches for how to respond the next time he (or any partner) comes into

your office. Here are some suggestions to consider:

• Listen carefully, ask a lot of questions about how your complaining partner would handle

the situation or personal issue in question and why. You may want to explain why you are

doing things the way you are (without coming across as either defensive or apologetic) and

then tell the complainer that you will think about what they have told you, and perhaps even

seek some advice and counsel from others. As previously mentioned, our experience is that

most people are satisfied if they are heard, and their views are treated respectfully and

considered.

• Another possibility for the partner who obviously is interested in what is going on within

the firm, but expresses his/her interest through complaints would be to assign that partner a

job, a temporary task force to lead, or some sort of responsibility. Having a role that would

acquaint the partner with the challenges of leadership might give the partner a new

perspective.

• Ask your partner to generate a list of possible solutions to his or her complaint.

Acknowledge the concern while directing your conversation toward the importance of

solving the problem and not just venting. Then ask him to go away and give some thought

to generating a list of at least four possible alternative solutions. Suggesting the number

four should prevent him from simply telling you what you should be doing to solve the

issue. Making him go away should be done in a manner that informs him that you value his

views and would really welcome his further and serious reflection on the situation that he

raised.

Asking for their solutions to their complaint is a good tactic. When a partner has to think

about an issue with a view toward finding a solution, many times they realize that the

solution it is not as simple as they might have thought. By taking this approach, you

reinforce the principle that venting about a problem is insufficient without also coming

forward with some possible options for how to correct the situation.

• Finally, don’t be hesitant to inform some partner, who habitually drops into your office,

that you are currently in the midst of something else and ask if the two of you might find

another time to meet. Many complaints are spur of the moment, based on an irritant that

just occurred. After a partner has time to think about the matter, he or she often comes to

the conclusion on their own, that it was not as important as they initially thought.

However, if you do this, you must get back to the partner (preferably in their office) so they

do not get the impression that you are just blowing him off.

It is worth emphasizing that in the managing partner's world, the immediate tends to drive

out the important, and it is possible to spend 80% of your time on the 20% least valuable

people or issues. Finding efficient ways to handle these situations or discouraging

repetitive, time-consuming "visits" is important.

To submit your questions to the LAB click here 

The LAB was formed as a resource to provide pragmatic advice to assist new managing

partners with their critical burning issues and help them succeed. The LAB is comprised of

the following distinguished current and former law firm leaders: Angelo Arcadipane

(Dickstein Shapiro LLP); John Bouma (Snell & Wilmer LLP); Brian K. Burke (Baker &

Daniels LLP); Ben F. Johnson, III (Alston & Bird LLP); John R. Sapp (Michael Best &

Friedrich LLP); Keith B. Simmons (Bass Berry & Sims PLC); William J. Strickland

(McGuire Woods LLP); Harry P. Trueheart, III (Nixon Peabody LLP); together with

Patrick J. McKenna (Edge International).